Conquering The Chaos: (7) Ways To Transform Your Evening Routine And Slay Mom Life
Feeling burned out...like your days are just running together? Already tired for tomorrow? When I first became a stay at home mom, it seemed like forever to find some kind of rhythm. When I finally felt I was regaining some sanity, I was completely thrown off a few years later when I joined the two under two gang, with back to back pregnancies.
But, I found some simple things that I began including in my evening routine that can help you take back control of your days. I've also included some tips for common obstacles a lot of moms face; like having a newborn with a crazy sleep schedule or that always wants to be held.
1 - PUT A HARD STOP ON YOUR TO DOs
Yes, I know! A mom’s job is never really done; there’s always another task. That being said, it is important to have a clear stopping point. Otherwise, your days run too late and leave you feeling continuously fatigued. This is no good for your mental or physical health.
Put away the rest of your to-do list for the following day. If, there’s something that's really nagging at you, perhaps give yourself some time in the morning to tackle this before the kids are awake.
2 - PREP OUTFITS
Lay out the following days clothes for both you and your little one(s). It's a simple task, but such a time saver, especially if you have multiple kids. It’s one less thing to think about while getting everyone together in the morning. I lay everything out for myself and each child, down to the diaper bag is prepped. And, have them laid out where they’re super easy to just grab.
TIP: If you have a good space where you can have everything laid out, try prepping outfits for the entire week instead.
3 - PREP FOOD
Meal prepping is another key step in your days running smoother. Set your coffee or tea on a timer, portion out snacks, wash and prep fruits/veggies. Is there anything that needs to be taken out of the freezer? Just a few minutes to do the prep work for any meals for the following day can save you a ton of time and stress the next day.
4 - QUICK RESET
Trust me, I understand; cleaning is the last thing you feel like doing, but you'll be so grateful in the morning. We're not delving into any deep cleaning; just a quick tidying up to start fresh in the morning, and focusing on the high traffic areas.
Have kids put away toys (if they can)
Put away any leftovers and wash the dishes
Wipe down counters & table
Quick sweep or vacuum of the floors
5 - PLAN FOR NEXT DAY
Prepare your list of things to do for the next day. Waking up with a plan already in place, makes a big difference in the flow of your day and actually feeling productive.
I don't know about you, but I have to write things down. Otherwise, nothing would ever get done. If you also need a checklist. Be sure to include:
Any appointments
Phone calls you need to make
Bills that need to be paid, and...
Things you need to pick up (for the house, kids, dinner, etc.)
TIP: Any checklist or schedule should be posted up in an area where you can clearly see it throughout the day and be reminded.
6 - WORK IN SOME SELF CARE
Even if this just includes the basics, just be sure to take some time to care for you. Brush and floss, a nice warm shower, wash and moisturize your skin. These simple things can go such a long way in you feeling healthier and happier. But, do include anything that you enjoy or makes you feel good; a book, trimming your nails, stretching, etc.
REMEMBER, that you are also an example to your children. You are showing them the importance of nurturing oneself.
7 - SQUEEZE IN SOME TIME WITH YOUR PARTNER
As a mom of three little ones (currently a 6, 2, & 1 year old) I know how difficult this can be. With all the commitments in your life and fatigue taking over, it can be difficult to rekindle/maintain that connection, but it is very important that you do.
Here are some ways my husband and I have managed to stay connected.
Take our shower in the evening together.
Cuddle on the sofa and watch a show or movie .
I've sat down with the kids for dinner, but not eat. When he gets home we have our dinner together and talk, listen to music, etc. while the kids are in bed.
SOME TIPS TO MAKE ACTUALLY PUT A BETTER ROUTINE IN PLACE:
Give yourself grace. Don’t stress yourself trying to follow a rigid evening routine. It only defeats the purpose. If you find it too overwhelming, simply start with one thing. Once you get that down, you can move on to the something else. You work on until it too becomes a habit.
Find your own rhythm. The key in any routine you put in place, is finding what works best for you and your family, and sticking to it. If something feels like too much and is not working, adjust it to work for you. Remember, that you are aiming for consistency. Once you have a solid system in place for you, it will begin to feel less like work.
Have a plan for dinner. And, no this does not have to mean the whole family sitting together every single night. Perhaps some nights you have dinner together. But, it might mean eating when the kids are in bed, ordering take out. More importantly, have a consistent dinner time for your little one(s).
Set a bedtime for your kids (and you)…And stick to it. Rest is a form of self-care. So, it’s important for kids to get good rest, and for you to also prioritize your own sleep. Things happen, and so there might be times you all are thrown off schedule, just pick back up the next evening. But, I found that when I didn’t have a set bedtime, I kept staying up much later than I should. With consistency, overtime, it became easier to get the kids to bed and they stayed asleep much longer.
SOLUTIONS TO SOME OBSTACLES SOME MOMS MIGHT FACE WHEN CREATING A ROUTINE:
You might be on your own in the evenings. For much of our relationship my husband’s work has had him completely away from home for long periods of time or he has gotten home late in the evenings. Since the bulk of the childcare has been on me, it also means flying solo for our evening routines. But here are some things that made it easier, and hopefully will help you too.
TIPS:
A baby carrier; great for still being hands free and getting as much done as you can while keeping baby nearby.
Consider allowing screen time. I allowed screen time for a little while in the evenings. it keeps the little ones busy while I prepped dinner and knocked some other things off the list for the evening.
Involve kids in tasks, as much as you can. For instance, if laundry is being done that day, my 7 year old is capable of moving the clothes over to the dryer and putting it on. I put on the clean up songs for my younger kids and putting toys away becomes a fun game.
Kids that take a long time to fall asleep or don’t stay asleep.
Co-sleeping may not be for everyone, but it was certainly a life saver for me and my sanity. With three kids on three different sleep schedules, it help me to transition everyone into the same schedule. This is how I adjusted my routine for sometime until the kids got better with there sleep.
First, understand that this is simply a season of motherhood, and that this messy sleep schedule won't be forever. While the kids were allowed some screen time in the evenings, it allowed time to prepare dinner. And, in that time I aimed to make enough to have for lunch or dinner the following day. And, when I didn’t have to attend to the food, I would also prep snacks for the next day...and clean up along the way.
Music can make all the difference. For my own peace of mind and to reign in on some of the chaos, I grabbed my phone, put some tunes on and made it a fun time for us all. We would dance and sing along as they had their baths, brushed their teeth, etc.
Once it was time for bed, we had story time, and I put on some relaxing sleep sounds. I made sure to have anything I would need on the nightstand. Book, snacks, headphones, laptop, etc. Once they’re asleep, I can read, watch something on my computer (hence the headphones), listen to my own music, have a snack.
Note that: This made it a lot easier to get them to fall asleep. And, it was also much easier to cope with having to remain nearby. After awhile they no longer needed me there.
CONCLUSION
Remember, every season has its challenges, and adapting your routine to your current circumstance is key. By incorporating these tips and staying flexible, you can create an evening routine that brings a sense of control, peace, and balance to your life. What small adjustments can you make today to start building a more manageable and fulfilling routine for yourself
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